What are three ways to get motivated and confident in trusting others with a little word and behavior?
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When consulting or giving advice to someone, it is important to win the trust of the other person and to motivate and elicit confidence. Entrepreneur and writer Barry Davret summarizes '3 ways to gain motivation and self-confidence with just a few words of action.'
How To Make Someone Feel Extraordinary By Saying Very Little
https://medium.com/swlh/how-to-make-someone-feel-extraordinary-by-saying-very-little-887811246bae
Around 2006, Davret went to a man who worked as a mentor to support people. At the time, Davret had business-related worries, but Davret could gain a great deal of confidence by talking to the man for only two hours, and a $ 12,500 mentoring program contract fee on the spot (Approximately 1.35 million yen).
'I have never felt so important and talented in my life before.I own the world,' said Davret, looking back on his contract. I felt like that. ' The $ 12,500 amount wasn't cheap for Davret, but even 14 years later, by 2020, he stated that the contract was the smartest contract in his life.
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Among them, I feel that Davret was valuable, a technique that sold a contract of $ 12,500 to Davret in just 2 hours after the man met, and a few weeks after the start of the mentor program, the man said `` Seeds '' It was taught as a 'lighting'. The man said that he won Davret's trust and led to a big contract by the following three actions.
◆ 1: Show interest in the other party
When Davret first entered the men's office, the man sat Davret down, refused to 'wait a minute', turned off his mobile phone and put it in the drawer at his desk. The man then called the assistant woman and told him to 'do not interrupt their conversation for anything other than an emergency call from a family member.' After the assistant left the man, he took out a new notepad and pen, sat opposite Davret, and began a conversation saying, 'Tell me about your problem.'
The man never said, 'I have the utmost interest in you,' but the whole sequence of actions was calculated. By dare turning off the mobile phone in front of Mr. Davret, telling the assistant woman not to interrupt, and preparing a new notepad, the man told Davret through words and behavior `` I am to you I am interested and respectful. ' In fact, it seems that he told the assistant woman in advance `` Do not disturb during conversation with the customer '', but as a demonstration to show to Davret, the man dared to pay attention in front of Mr. Davret That's right. As a result, Davret perceived that he was treated as an important person through the behavior of men, and gained trust in men.
Also, body language, posture, and smile during conversation are important to win the trust of the other party. 'If you want to tell someone you're interested, don't say it. Let your behavior and body language conclude that you're impressed.' 'Davret argued.
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◆ 2: Ask a question to “let the other person continue talking”
As Davret started talking about his problem, the man began to write down Davret's content in a notepad at a furious pace. And when Davret was stuck in the words, he asked the right mates and questions, and he seemed to draw further from Davret.
Later, a man told Davret that he had called his question `` reversals '', not to build up the conversation, but mainly to elicit the other party's story. It was throwing. Mr. Davret said that the male question was not to change the direction of the conversation or force it, but to give the other party the feeling that `` I am controlling the conversation '' and make the conversation pleasant Is. The questions the man actually asked were:
* 1: 'Why? I didn't think it would come.'
・ 2: “Really? If you like, please tell me more”
・ 3: 'Interesting. What did you think of it?'
* 4: 'It's interesting. Then?'
・ 5 ： “Why did that happen?
・ 6 ： 'So? Don't stop there. I need to listen more.'
・ 7 ： 'I see, yes. Is there anything else?'
Everything includes the form of the question, but the important thing is that there are words before and after the question that serve as cushioning material for the conversation. 'Why?', 'What happened then?' 'Really?' Tend to give a natural and severe impression. So, the man said that by putting words that serve as cushioning materials along with the questions, the conversation was made natural. Also, if a man really wanted to change the topic, he asked Davret, 'Can I change the topic?' And always asked for permission.
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◆ 3: Tell your partner that you have more abilities than you are aware of
While Davret talked about his problems, the man took many notes, listened to the story in a sincere manner, and eventually filled the notepad over four pages. The man then summed up the conclusions on the whiteboard and told Davret that he wanted to make $ 100,000 (about 11 million yen) on his project, `` Barry, your project is $ 250,000 (about 27 million) It is worth 'yen)' and 'he heard your story and thought that you could do more'. Davret agreed to sign a $ 12,500 contract, partly because of the problems he pointed out.
The man listened very seriously to Davret, analyzed the problems, praised Davret's strengths, and provided advice on how to improve his strengths. He confidently presented a realistic solution to the business and told him that he could go far beyond Davret's goals.
Davret points out that if you encourage someone to say, 'You have more abilities than you are aware of,' you need to find a basis for the encouragement. To that end, it is important to be enthusiastic about what the other person talks about, make an effort to discover advantages that the other person does not notice, and appeal to the other person with a sincere attitude.
by mentatdgt
While these techniques are simple and clear, Davret said that they need practice and consistency to be successful in interacting with the other party.
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