Claims that 'mutual masturbation' will eliminate the orgasm gap between men and women
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A joint study of more than 52,000 people published in 2017 by Chapman University and the Kinsey Institute showed that 95% of heterosexual men orgasm during sex, while the rate for heterosexual women is 65%. When only one partner in a couple orgasms, it leads to frustration and dissatisfaction for the other partner, and mutual masturbation has been suggested as a way to solve this problem.
How mutual masturbation can help close the orgasm gap
https://mashable.com/2018/05/07/mutual-masturbation-orgasm-gap/
According to writer and columnist Dan Savage , the fact that 'heterosexual women have the least orgasm experience' shown in the above study means that 'sexual activity between heterosexual men and women is not going well.' Savage advocates that heterosexual couples should also engage in 'mutual masturbation,' which is often done by homosexual couples. 'Mutual masturbation by homosexuals is not counted as sex by heterosexuals, especially men,' Savage says. However, heterosexual couples also need to change their view of 'mutual masturbation' and consider it to be the 'main sexual activity' rather than 'just a comforting act that is not sex.' Savage believes that changing the perspective in this way will enrich the sex life of heterosexual couples.
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In the UK, it has been pointed out that 'sex education fails to teach about sexual pleasure.' In addition to this failure of sex education, it is believed that the orgasm gap between men and women is caused by a lack of communication with partners. Mutual masturbation is a non-verbal form of communication that is also suitable for solving such problems. Past research has shown that women need more than just penetration to reach orgasm, and through mutual masturbation, men can learn how women orgasm.
Heather Corinna, founder of sex education site Scarleteen , agrees that there are benefits to women masturbating in front of men, because mutual masturbation is about what feels good to you, not about how you behave to please the other person.
However, since masturbation is culturally perceived as shameful, some people may feel reluctant to mutual masturbation. Regarding this point, Corinna says, 'Remember that the perception that masturbation is shameful is the same as the idea that sexual activity is not for the pleasure of people, especially women. ' In order to eliminate the orgasm gap, it is necessary to change how women's pleasure is treated.
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For those who are reluctant to masturbate in front of their partner, Savage suggests a 'gradual habituation' method. First, the woman closes the door to her room and masturbates alone when her male partner is at home. Once they get used to it, they enter the room together, but the woman is blindfolded and masturbates without the man realizing that he is looking at her. After repeating this and feeling less resistant, the blindfold is removed and they masturbate together. It is also said that having sex over the phone can help ease feelings of shame because there is no visual information.
In addition, one of the pieces of advice Savage gives to heterosexual men is to 'watch gay porn.' In gay porn, men are seen masturbating during sexual intercourse. Savage also says that gay porn teaches us 'not to be too self-conscious.' In gay porn, touching one another and touching oneself are depicted as one, and it is clear that mutual masturbation is natural. Ahead of National Masturbation Day on May 28, Savage said, 'Mutual masturbation does not mean that your partner is unattractive or that your partner is not satisfied with you.'
By Becca Tapert
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