Jun 05, 2021 20:00:00

Survey reveals that there are many men who have sex with other men even though they are not gay. Why do straight men sleep with other men?

A large-scale survey in the United States has revealed that there are many men who have sex with other men, despite being attracted to women as romantic or sexual partners. Tony Silva, a gender researcher at the University of British Columbia, explains the answer to the question, 'Why do straight men have sex with other men?'

Why some straight men have sex with other men

https://theconversation.com/why-some-straight-men-have-sex-with-other-men-160140

According to the large-scale '

National Family Survey (PDF file) ' conducted by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, of the approximately 50 million men aged 18 to 44 who answered 'I am heterosexual (straight)' to the survey, 28,000 answered 'I have had sexual intercourse with someone of the same sex.' Although the percentage is not high at about 0.5%, the figure of 28,000 cannot be ignored.

Silva, who studies the mismatch between sexual identity and behavior, interviewed 60 straight men who have sex with other men as part of his research. And the results of this research revealed three reasons why straight men have sex with other men:

1. To avoid cheating
The number one reason straight men have sex with other men is to avoid cheating. Several of the men Silva interviewed said they were having problems with satisfying sex in their marriages. So they chose to have sex outside of marriage as a way to have sex without threatening their marriage.

'To me, having a romantic relationship is more degrading than having sex with someone other than my wife,' said Tom, a Washington resident, who participated in the survey. 'If I were to meet someone new now, I wouldn't cheat or leave my wife,' said Ryan, an Illinois resident.

Men like Tom and Ryan believe that having extramarital sex with women leads to the breakdown of a marriage, but that having extramarital sex with men is not such a big deal. However, they had not told their wives that they were having sex with men.

◆2: Complex issues are involved
Some people said that they separate sexual identity from sex because it is accompanied by political and social ties. Connor, who lives in Oregon, told Silva's survey, 'I think there is a decisive divide between what we call 'gay' and 'homosexuals.' There is the 'gay community,' but there is also the 'gay community,' which is not really a community. In other words, just as you can be an athlete without being

a jock , you can be homosexual without being gay, and vice versa. Everything is political these days.'

The men Silva spoke to described themselves as straight because they believed it best represented their romantic relationships with women, their connection to the heterosexual community, or their masculinity. They also considered having sex with men separate from all other identities.

◆3: Influence of the environment
Living in small towns and rural areas also influenced the formation of the men's self-awareness. Larry, who lives in Wyoming, the 10th largest state in the United States by area but the smallest by population, said, 'I say I'm straight because it fits best with the cultural norms of the area.' Silva analyzed this by saying, 'People like Larry are satisfied with their lives and identities, so they don't go out of their way to say they're gay or bisexual, either to others or to themselves.'

None of the men Silva spoke to described themselves as straight because they were homophobic , and most were supportive of legal rights and equality for gay, lesbian, and bisexual people.

Based on these findings, Silva concluded, 'The formation of sexual identity is influenced by many factors, including not only sexual preferences and behaviors, but also social background, romantic relationships, and ideas about masculinity and femininity. Straight men who have sex with men do not seem to hide their relationships; it just doesn't seem to affect how they perceive their identity.'