Research reveals that the negative impact of refusing an invitation is not that great
I'm sure many of you have felt guilty after turning down an invitation to hang out or a drinking party. A study that looked at the impression that refusing an invitation leaves on others reveals that it's not as bad as people might imagine.
Saying no: The negative ramifications from invitation declines are less severe than we think.
People exaggerate the consequences of saying no to invites | Ars Technica
https://arstechnica.com/science/2023/12/turning-down-holiday-invites-isnt-going-to-obliterate-your-social-life/
A group of researchers led by assistant professor Julian Zivi, a psychologist at West Virginia University, conducted a series of experiments with participants divided into ``inviters'' and ``invitees.'' They instruct those who receive invitations to always decline invitations and ask them to imagine how the other person will feel if they decline. The person inviting them was instructed to express how they felt when their invitation was rejected.
The first experiment involved imagining that a hypothetical friend had invited you to see an exhibition at a museum, and then declining the invitation. Most people who are invited imagine that the person who invited them will be angry, disappointed, or think that they are not thinking about the person's feelings, and they will not talk to the person who invited them. Some even felt that their relationship would deteriorate.
However, the person inviting them did not think of the bad things that the person being invited might imagine. Experiments have shown that people who invite people imagine what it would be like to be rejected, so even if an invitation is rejected, they accept it and are less likely to be negatively affected.
Subsequent experiments were conducted in which participants were asked to rate scenes in which someone declined an invitation, but as expected, people often overestimated the feelings of the person inviting them. These results show that those who are invited tend to think about the inviter's feelings more than necessary, and tend to underestimate the fact that the inviter is also thinking about the invitee's feelings. Masu.
Zivi et al. point out, ``People who are invited to be invited are somewhat exaggeratedly worried that by declining the invitation, they will make the other person angry, and that they will lose trust in themselves.'' No, I don't always recommend turning down invitations. Spending time with other people creates important relationships in your life. If you keep saying no, you'll often end up doing more harm than good. However, even if you decline the invitation, the repercussions may not be as bad as you think.''
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