What is the method to heal “dissatisfaction with life”?

Work, friends, romance, and hobbies can enrich your life, but dissatisfaction with them can interfere with your life. Scientific YouTube channel

Kurzgesagt explains the mechanism of feeling happiness and “the habit of healing the dissatisfaction with life and feeling happiness” supported by scientific research.

An Antidote to Dissatisfaction-YouTube

Everyone has a feeling that 'things don't go as expected' ...

You may feel that you are not successful enough at work or that your friendship is not working.

“I do n’t have what I really want”

When such feelings become chronic, not only will you be jealous of others, but you will also feel depressed.

In recent years, pop culture and social media have advertised, “It is a 'failure' except for the ideal job”, “It is a real happiness to have a great experience, make many friends, and find“ Soulmate ”” The feeling of jealousy and melancholy for others is worsened because it seems that “other people are finding real happiness”.

In addition, there are a lot of self-educating products on the market, so it is easy to accept that you are not doing your best.

About such dissatisfaction with life, a study began about 20 years ago, 'How far have people faced the urge to 'do things not go as expected'?' As a result of the research, '

Positive Psychology ' that studies 'What makes life rich' appeared. At the same time, “ cognitive behavioral therapy ” that changes negative emotions has also developed.

Researchers are beginning to analyze 'causes that produce happiness and fulfilling feelings' and 'how to adapt the causes to people.'

Researchers argue that “thank you” is the best magic bullet for “dissatisfaction with life”.

If you say “thank you”, you will find a self-enlightening image that is popular on SNS.

This commentary is based on scientific research.

Appreciation has different meanings depending on the person and the situation. Feelings about what others have done for you, feelings of the weather, nature and destiny.

What existed before thankfulness can be called “

mutual benefit ”. Reciprocity is like a biological signal that directs organisms to exchange things for each other for mutual benefit, and behavior based on reciprocity has been confirmed in certain fish, birds and mammals. However, the most reciprocal behavior of living creatures is primates, including humans.

When the primate brain recognizes that “others have done something good for themselves,” a response of gratitude occurs and an urge to return.

Thanks to appreciation, primates started to care about each other.

Humans are particularly good at reading other people's feelings, and can identify and avoid “selfish people”.

This ability is an evolutionary advantage of living well with others, creating a lasting relationship that “keep appreciation for each other”.

The ancestors of mankind have created bonds and friendships through this relationship. Thus, thanks in the early days of human history could be said to be a biological mechanism that modifies one's attitude to cooperate with each other.

And over time, gratitude became more than an urge to build a mutually beneficial relationship.

Studies have shown that gratitude is associated with a

reward system that stimulates the nerves of the brain to form social bonds and take in the intentions of others.

In addition, gratitude also helps to preserve and remember positive memories.

Appreciation can also neutralize the tendency to be jealous and the tendency to compare yourself with others

, such as narcissism , cynicism , materialism, and negative emotions.

As a result, we know that those who are grateful tend to be filled with happiness.

Those who frequently appreciate can not only build good relationships, but also make friends easily, have a high quality of sleep, tend not to fall into depression, addiction, burnout, etc., and overcome trauma Excellent ability.

On the other hand, there is a “psychological trap” in modern society.

Even if you've been working hard for a long time, when you get it, you seem to be sparse and you're not satisfied with the status quo, but you continue to work hard on something in pursuit of satisfaction ...

“Psychological jealousy” means that a friend invites a friend to think that they are not enough.

However, if you can appreciate your friendship, you can accept or invite your friends. And as a result of expanding your friendship, you have the chance to meet new people.

Appreciation creates positive behavior, and you can get a “thank you loop” where your positive behavior draws out the gratitude of others.

For those who have just finished a difficult experience with chemotherapy ...

Even having dinner with friends in the sun is full of happiness.

For those who have overcome hard times, even if their life is heading a little worse, there will be a grateful response in the brain, as it compares the hard times with the present.

In short, thankfulness reminds me of the “good things” I already have.

As a result, you feel better and have a positive experience.

There are individual differences in how much gratitude is remembered, and it depends on the “thank you trait” that determines how much gratitude you remember.

We know that thanksgiving traits depend on heredity, personality, and culture ...

Scientists have begun research on “changing appreciation characteristics”.

However, there is still an unknown part about “how much the appreciation characteristics change with acquired efforts” and “how long the effect will last if changed.” Therefore, it cannot be said that there are medicines that make you happy. Life is complex and there are days when it works and some days it doesn't work.

On the other hand, as a result of pursuing happiness, there are also cases where you become unhappy.

Appreciation also does not cure depression or make specialist treatment unnecessary.

Appreciation does not solve anything. Appreciation is just one piece to solve the puzzle of life.

The simple way to practice thanks, supported by solid research, is to “apply a gratitude diary”. Thanksgiving diary is to write 5-10 notes of “thanks” once to three times a week.

It may seem strange when you started a thank-you diary, but as you continue, you will be able to appreciate small things like “coffee was really delicious” and “others kindly”.

If you become grateful for what others have done, you will be able to appreciate just the fact that others are near you.

As a result of a huge number of surveys, it has been found that the happiness and satisfaction with the life of the subjects improved after continuing the appreciation diary for several weeks.

In addition, reports have been submitted that changes in brain activity caused by a gratitude diary persist for several months after the gratitude diary.

Practicing gratitude may be a real way to recreate yourself. If you change your beliefs about yourself or your life, you can change your thoughts and feelings and change your behavior.

All you need is paper and a pen, a reflection like a gratitude diary that only takes a few minutes at a time, and it's amazing how brain activity changes.

If you are positive about your appreciation, your life may be better than you think.

in Science,   Video, Posted by log1k_iy